Previous Post – Gay Christians & Missional Integrity

All guests posts represent the opinions of the contributors, not necessarily the views I hold.  However, I share guest posts to give important and varied perspectives.  Wendy Gritter is a friend who I happily invite to share here and endorse to you all.

As the Executive Director of  New Direction Ministries of Canada, Wendy has put herself into line of fire in her commitment to build bridges and to “to nurture safe & spacious places for sexual minorities to explore & grow in faith in Jesus Christ.” This post is a follow up to yesterdays post “Gay Christians & Missional Integrity”, which in less than a day has become one of the most visited posts I have ever written.  Now, over to Wendy:

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More on Gay Christians & Missional Integrity
Wendy VanderWal-Gritter

I want to thank Jamie for adding his voice to the ongoing dialogue about honesty, authenticity and identity for those who find themselves differing from the heterosexual majority. This is a critical time in the history of the church to be intentional in articulating the many nuances and complexities of this matter.  The resolution that Christ-followers come to about their use of language, their attitudes and posture toward sexual minorities will have tremendous impact on not only how open LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) individuals will be to engage matters of Christian faith but also on others who are carefully watching how the church responds to the gay community.  Our public witness has been so hindered by the infighting and alienating responses of the church that 91% of young adults primarily describe their negative perception of Christians as “anti-gay”.   That is why it is so important that we have a constructive conversation about how to extend not only dignity and respect to those who may differ from us, but how to also demonstrate a tangible commitment to nurturing safe and spacious environments where gender and sexual minority individuals can explore and grow in faith in Jesus Christ.

For such an environment to exist, an individual has to feel able to honestly describe the reality of their life without the anticipation of a fearful, shaming or rejecting response.  Describing a reality and defining a primary identity are two different things. It is very important for individuals who experience an enduring reality of same-sex attraction to be able to speak honestly and authentically about that without continuously having to clarify and dismantle others’ assumptions.  For many young adults in particular, such a description might be simply being able to say, “I’m gay.”  By being sufficiently non-threatened to use the common descriptive language of our culture, the church demonstrates a willingness to surrender presumption, entitlement, and pride. By nurturing environments where people can be honest about the aspects of their reality that they navigate as followers of Christ without fear of judgment, we are simply living out God’s intention for shalom – a space in which people can flourish despite the limitations of our fallen world.

Many Christians seem very concerned that people would identify themselves with or by their sexuality.  However, for the majority of gay Christians I know, there is a very clear commitment to experience their primary identity as children of God, beloved, redeemed, forgiven and made righteous in Jesus Christ.  It is clear that they view their sense of self as much more than just their sexuality.  Yet as Christians lament their perception that gay people define themselves by their sexuality, it is often the case that the only intentional engagement of the church with sexual minority persons is around the issue of sexuality.  This then becomes an invitational circle that actually perpetuates an impoverished view of the nature of our humanness.

These conversations about describing reality and navigating identity don’t address the question of the appropriateness or inappropriateness of same-sex sexual relationships. That is a different conversation altogether.  Rather, this is about the more fundamental question of how our experience of sexuality affects our personhood. We as the church ought not to capitulate to a reductionistic notion that our sexuality is simply a carnal desire to have physical sexual relations. Nor should we simplistically view sexual attraction as only sexualized thought that can lead to temptation or lust.  Rather, our sexuality is our drive to overcome our aloneness – and therefore affects how we view and engage the world of people and relationships, how we express ourselves through creativity, humour, and other means of connection. Our sexuality, whether we find ourselves in the majority or minority of experiences, has the capacity to express goodness, beauty and love as we live in alignment with our beliefs and values.

All of human sexuality is affected to some degree by the reality that things are not fully as they should be. But, let us remember that heterosexual privilege is not Biblical. Heterosexual marriage may well have been God’s original design – but a privilege that puts others in a second class category is an evolved social construction and not inherently an aspect of the good news of the gospel that proclaims that ALL have access to reconciliation with God through the undeserved gift of grace through Jesus Christ.  We are called to imitate Christ and to therefore choose to be incarnational people.  This means we strip ourselves of privilege, status and reputation so that we can identify with those on the margins, those who are alienated or outcast and extend the good news of reconciliation in Christ.  Let us stand in solidarity with anyone who finds themselves a minority and work to create environments where their stories, experiences and sense of self can be shared openly, honestly and authentically such that they can genuinely experience the hospitality of Jesus and a sense of deep belonging and acceptance in the Body of Christ.

To do this will require a willingness on the part of the majority to deconstruct unhelpful assumptions, use descriptive yet culturally relevant language, and most significantly adopt a posture of humility so that we can truly listen and encounter the real experience of our brothers and sisters who do not fit our nice neat categories of gender and sexuality.  My prayer is that in the process of humble listening, we will learn how to extend the unconditional acceptance of another’s personhood just as Christ has extended it to us.