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I have a confession to make: When I first saw that there was a book being published called “The Missional Mom: Living with Purpose at Home & in the World” (Moody, 2010) by Helen Lee, my inner cynic began to grumble.  I expected another misappropriation of the term “missional” advocating an insular, restricted lifestyle for Christian women.  Therefore, I was not only surprised when this was not the case at all, but thrilled when I found myself digging into one of the best additions to the missional conversation I had read in years.  Helen Lee speaks with honesty and humility while never wavering from the prophetic and disruptive truth about the missional vocation of every Christians, Moms included.

Here’s what the publisher has to say about the book:

“We all must seek to be missional in our life journey.    Today’s Christian moms come from a full range of personal and professional context, whether they are homemakers, full-time in the marketplace, or somewhere in between.  Numerous Christian mothers  are living missional lives, using their gifts and abilities to further God’s kingdom by engaging the world around them.  They artfully, passionately, sometimes messily, juggle multiple callings and demonstrate in their modern day contexts how they are emulating the woman of noble character in Proverbs 31. The Missional Mom will affirm Christian mothers who desire to not only to build their homes in a Christ-like way, but engage the world with their skills, abilities, and interests.  It won’t minimize the importance of a woman’s role in her home but it will encourage her to not ignore the stirrings God has planted within her to extend her influence.”

Instead of going on about the book, let me share with you the conversation I had with Helen Lee.  I am sure you will be ordering the book by the time you reach the end:

Jamie Arpin-Ricci: I must admit that with the increasing misuse of the word “missional”, when I first read the title of your book, I was skeptical & cynical.  However, it didn’t take long in reading your book to realize was legit (and I humbly repented my cynicism).  Tell us briefly how you came to the missional conversation.

Helen Lee: In 2008, Leadership Journal asked me to do an article about trends in the missional church; the article was called “Missional Shift or Drift” (Nov. 2008) and actually earned an award in reporting from the Evangelical Press Association. I had heard the term “missional” before doing this article, but I had very little idea what it specifically meant, so researching the topic was my entrance into understanding more about the word and what it meant. The more I read and understood, the more I found myself resonating with all I was reading.

JAR: What does “missional” mean to you?  Why is it critical for you to link the idea of being missional with motherhood?

HL: There has been so much written about this word that it’s daunting to try to encapsulate it into a few sentences! But for me, being missional means to embrace your calling as God’s missionary in whatever context he has placed you, and embracing his mission for you as your primary calling in life. For the Christian mother, who often mistakenly assumes that once she becomes a mom that motherhood is supposed to be her primary calling in life, I feel as though the missional perspective offers a great corrective.

Once you become a mom, your mission does not change! You are still primarily called to be God’s witness (locally and globally) and disciple-maker, and of course your home is a big context in which that happens. But by no means is it intended to be the only one. Embracing a missional perspective as a mother means that you understand your primary calling as God’s ambassador in this world, and you integrate motherhood into that calling.

And, as Scot McKnight explains so succinctly in the book, being missional is about asking a simple question: “How can I help you?” Mothers have so many opportunities to ask that question in their daily walks of life. In their neighborhoods, in their children’s school, in their workplaces–asking the question means you are taking a proactive posture and initiating in people’s lives rather than retreating into one’s own home life and ignoring the needs around you. Being a missional mom means the opposite of only focusing on one’s family; it means embracing God’s call to have an impact on the world around us, and helping our families to also be a vehicle God uses to help, serve, and love others.

JAR: As a man preparing to be a stay at home dad, your book has been deeply applicable to me too.  Would you say that your book is important to read by people other than just moms?  Who else should be reading this book?

HL: Great question! Absolutely, the concepts apply whether you are a mom or a dad. But I saw such a dearth in the Christian literature of books for moms that encouraged this type of thinking. Many Christian motherhood books encourage the mother to focus inwardly–teaching how to be a great mom and wife and how to shepherd one’s children–and these are important ideas to think about. But I felt that mothers were missing the bigger picture of who God had created them to be and leaning more towards an idolatrous view of family life rather than seeing their homes as missional outposts. So while the concepts apply to anyone seeking to live a committed Christian life, I felt that moms in particular needed to receive the book’s message.

JAR: What are some the costs of being a missional mom?  What costs have you paid?

HL: I feel as though being a missional mom means that you are charting a lifestyle and a path that will look and feel quite different from even that of a majority of Christians, so you are bound to get push back, questions, and alienation from others who either don’t understand what you mean or who don’t agree–even from other Christians or from your loved ones. A number of the women I interviewed who were living amazingly missional lives told me of how their family relations were strained when they made decisions such as moving to the inner city, for example.

Personally speaking, I am experiencing the tension of wanting to be a part of a committed missional community with others who have the same values, but the majority of my current church is not in the same place. So I’m trying to generate more interest and understanding of what being missional looks like in one’s life–fledgling though I am myself in this journey–but it is slow going. Some of the personal decisions I’ve made as a result of writing this book (such as choosing to home school, something I never before expected to do!) have also generated tension with my family, who do not understand why we would do such a thing. So yes, there are costs to being a missional mom, but I’ve not heard anyone say that the costs they have paid (and many I know have paid way more than myself!) are not worth it.

JAR: Is there any content that you wish you had included in the book that aren’t there?

HL: I just recently realized how many of the interviews I conducted did not make it into the book in full. I’m slowly starting to edit those and post on my site, such as the one I did with Scot McKnight. I interviewed a number of missional leaders and moms who shared great insights and stories, and I’d love to add them all back into the site as I am able. I also wish I had more stories of missional moms in the context of the local church. I have a few, but I wish I could have done much more in that area. Or missional moms abroad. Or more missional moms in the workplace..or…I could just go on and on!

JAR: By ‘website’, you mean The Missional Mom website.  I highly recommend people head over there (and to follow you on Twitter @themissionalmom).  How has the book been received so far?  Any stories stand out?

HL: I’ve been quite humbled and honored by some of the things that have been written about the book. More than I ever expected, actually, such as when Scot McKnight posted about the book, or when Ed Stetzer emailed me and wanted to highlight the book on his site. I have never met either in person, so to have their support and encouragement for the book means a great deal. A fun story is how I was able to get Valerie Bell, chair of the board of MOPS International, to endorse the book. I went to a reception given by Act One, an organization supporting Christians working in Hollywood, as I’ve always had this secret dream to be a screenwriter of some sort. It turns out the reception was hosted by Valerie and her husband Steve, and as the night progressed I found out she was on the board of MOPS. As I still was hoping for more people in the “mom” space to support the book, I sent her a copy of the galley the next day, but never heard from her. She had gone to Lausanne and hadn’t had time to read it until literally the day before the endorsement was due. She graciously and unbelievably finished the book in one night and offered the endorsement that resides on the book’s cover. I’m very grateful to her for her support.

JAR: Which books and/or blogs are capturing your missional imagination these days?

HL: “Radical” by David Platt is just astounding me these days. I feel as though I’m highlighting everything. I’m also thoroughly enjoying Scot McKnight’s “One.Life” and “Right Here, Right Now” by Lance Ford and Alan Hirsch. (Kindle for iPad has been such a blessing for me!)

There are so many blogs I visit that reference missional living or the missional church, so it’s very difficult to pick one. But as someone living in the suburbs myself right now, I appreciate Michael Wallenmeyer’s Missional in Suburbia site; I enjoy just about everything written by the bloggers on the Ecclesia Network; I always enjoy The Jesus Creed blog, and of course, your blog! I know I’m forgetting some but those are the first that come to mind.

JAR: Tell us something odd or unusual about yourself we would otherwise never know.

HL: I am an amazing foosball player. If we are ever at the same conference and there is a table, watch out. I put on a little bit of false humility (”Oh, yes, I’ve played this before”) and then I clobber you. =) I’m also a huge NFL fan and one of my greatest sources of pride and joy is that I was the fantasy football champion of Christianity Today International back in 2001.

JAR: Thanks Helen!

Buy “The Missional Mom” today!